I couldn’t sleep last night I was up early and I found comfort sitting and looking out at the trees. With Autumn upon us their leaves begin to change from the usual deep green to shades of orange, red, and brown and as the breeze comes they gently release from their branches and float to the ground just starting to pile at the base. Watching them I began comparing my life to a tree. My Tree of Life once so big and green. Under its grand canopy I could find shade from the heat that life cooks up, or hold tight to its trunk for safety during one of life’s many storms. And occasionally when life gets too much to handle I could climb up into the shelter of its leaves to hide for a while.
Just as autumn has come to my back yard it has also come to my life through this tragedy and my tree which was once so bountiful is now baron and empty. As I stand here looking up at this new tree I can’t help but think maybe it could be useful too. No it is not the shelter it once was but perhaps its empty branches could be used to reach out to someone, or as a walking stick to lean on while I shoulder this heavy burden. And when winter comes and the blinding snow and rain fall all around and life has chilled me to the core maybe I could use its fruitless wood for a warm embracing fire. The desolate arms that were once my hiding place no longer exists but I can climb up its sturdy trunk and rather than hide I can stand. From high atop I can look out and see clearly the things below, which require change. When spring returns my tree might once again blossom and begin to show signs of life. It will be different now, some of its branches broken or missing. The scars of our journey visible on its trunk, but I know this tree will somehow be useful too. I am learning that life may take from us, but the tools we need to survive it are always there, if we choose to see them.